Reflektions... warning long rant

[falcongeorge]

I used to get a little irritated when my stepson had his phone out but latter learned he was taking a lot of pictures of us and projects we were working on.

In my opinion, like many of you, we are not so much cramped for time in our easy, convenient modern life style as we think. I believe due to our electronic devices and unbalanced time spent on entertainment that we simply end up spending too much time with them and in turn feel cramped trying to get the important things done. I strived to spend more time with my family by spending less time on my own projects and at times saying no my employer. Although there were times when I was hypocritical, I can look back and not regret that I neglected my responsibility as a father or was selfish with my time.

I do not have the right to tell you dad's how to raise your children nor am I condiming anyone that, as I have, works long hours to provide. However I am in a position of experience that I hope no parent ever has to be in.

I had my child late in life, and am a retired stay at home dad with a 9 yr old daughter. One of the things I do, that I believe is REALLY valuable to both her and I, is I DO NOT pick her up from school in the car, I walk to pick her up, and we walk home together. We get off the busy streets and take quiet side streets, and we cut through a heavily forested park on the way home,,even though it means walking farther. The reason I believe this is so important is, it gives us time together immediately after school, where my attention is completely focused on her, nothing else. We talk about what happened in school, and if there have been problems with another child or something has pissed her off, it gives me the opportunity to talk to her in depth about how she could possibly resolve or deal with those issues in a constructive way, and if that isn't going to work, how to avoid taking on or internalizing other people's "issues". We spend time talking about nature, beauty, the importance of quiet time for introspection, and on and on.
The reasons for this are two-fold, it helps her learn to deal with conflicts and problems without having them take her over and rent space in her head, and in my opinion, more important, it shows her in a very real and concrete way that what she thinks and feels matters to me, and I am going to take the time to listen, and make the effort to understand.
I FREQUENTLY find myself having a conversation with other parents on the schoolyard that comment on how she seems to talk to me and tell me how she really feels and thinks about things, and I try to gently explain to them that its because when she talks to me, I listen and engage. I also find that I often know more about what THEIR kids are going through than they do themselves, this is because their kids talk more to my daughter than they do to their own parents.
Many times, I see these same parents, their children will approach them and try to talk about their problems, and the parents are too busy on their phones to listen. They pretend they are listening, but they are scrolling and texting the entire time, and the kids are VERY much aware that this is what they are doing, and their voices trail off and go quiet, and the kid walks away, with no meaningful feedback or interaction from the parent, other than a "yes" or "no". If you can't be bothered to listen go your child when they are 8 or 9, what the he'll makes you think they are going to come to YOU when they have a problem at 14 or 15?
Personally, I don't own a phone, I don't use Facebook or Twitter, or any of this other garbage, and I don't even post on here that much. This isn't because I am a luddite, or anti-technology, I have been using the internet since the eighties. Karl Marx said that religion was the opiate of the masses, but he was unable to see the arrival of personal electronics. And now, for many MANY people, the phone is their new God, their parent figure, their lover, and their best friend all rolled into one. It is changing us as a species, changing the way we relate to each other, isolating us, and totally disengaging us from each other. Stop and think about the ramifications of that for us as a species, and what it means for the future of democracy, and for civilization at large.

I believe that intelligence is, to a significant extent, learned. You must be born with the basic equipment, but from the very first, treated properly, you can be a sponge soaking up knowledge.

Intelligence is, when it comes right down to it, the ability to learn---and when very young, those you interact with can teach you how to go about it. It's been said that the ideal time to test intelligence is at two years old. So those first two years are vital. You're doing things right. Good for you, and your daughter will be the better for it.

KS

It's probably obvious at this point, but I agree 100%. The potential of kids just amazes me.

[falcongeorge]

This little video kind of sums it up for me. I refer to them as zombies.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QugooaNRnsk

I have seen that before, what amazing work.

[Dan859]

This little video kind of sums it up for me. I refer to them as zombies.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QugooaNRnsk

Here's the problem:  Cell phones aren't really the culprits.  Like some others have mentioned, the data apps can be very good; GPS, re-routing, weather, etc. are very useful.  The problem comes when you load social media apps onto your mobile phone.  I've read research that says getting "likes" or some other sort of positive reinforcement gives you a dopamine hit, so you tend to repeat that behavior.  Putting the social media apps on a mobile phone means you're getting those dopamine hits constantly.  It literally functions like an addiction, and it becomes a vicious circle.  I want my phone to do three things: phone calls, SMS/texts, and photos,  That's it.  I don't own a smart phone.  I tell people that I don't want a phone that's smarter than I am, but the truth is, I spend enough time on my computer at night, and having a smart phone would end up with me spending huge amounts of time on it when I really should be doing other things.     

[Falcon67]

We're both IT people and just spent 90 minutes in the driveway in the Escape....Lotsa fun, very cool stuff.  Love that tech. 

Wait till you have to change the battery in that Escape. Remove the windshield wipers, remove the cowl panel, remove the lower drain panel...just to get to it. I like my lo-tech Galaxie, Mustang and '70 truck

LOL - I don't work on the daily drivers.  Drop it at the dealer, battery plus $120/hr shop rate.  Same with oil changes - cheaper to let them do it and way, way less hassle.  Just drop off, they run me to work, they come pick me up when the car is ready.

[FElony]

I didn't want to get into this thread because I'd be spittin' vitriol for weeks. However, I came across this video that was linked in a ZH thread. Kind of amazing what "we" looked like back then.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=166&v=fISgKl8dB3M

[falcongeorge]

I didn't want to get into this thread because I'd be spittin' vitriol for weeks. However, I came across this video that was linked in a ZH thread. Kind of amazing what "we" looked like back then.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=166&v=fISgKl8dB3M

I sorta looked like that....well, except long greasy hair, beer in one hand, joint in the other, and not as fit...

[FElony]

I didn't want to get into this thread because I'd be spittin' vitriol for weeks. However, I came across this video that was linked in a ZH thread. Kind of amazing what "we" looked like back then.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=166&v=fISgKl8dB3M

I sorta looked like that....well, except long greasy hair, beer in one hand, joint in the other, and not as fit...

Yeah, I looked just like you when this video was filmed, but I was 6 years old.

[falcongeorge]

I didn't want to get into this thread because I'd be spittin' vitriol for weeks. However, I came across this video that was linked in a ZH thread. Kind of amazing what "we" looked like back then.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=166&v=fISgKl8dB3M

I sorta looked like that....well, except long greasy hair, beer in one hand, joint in the other, and not as fit...

Yeah, I looked just like you when this video was filmed, but I was 6 years old.

I got in supreme shit when I was ten. There was this corner store about a block from our school, this buddy of mine had parents who were total pisstanks, and we were sneaking over to his house at lunch and raiding the bar. This third kid started pestering us about what we were doing at lunch, so we took him with us. On the way back to school, we stopped at the corner store to get some gum, when we left, we didn’t notice that the “new” guy was missing.
About 20 minutes later, I am sitting in class, just enjoying the warm vodka afterglow, all of a sudden the principle is standing in the door of my classroom talking to my teacher, and they are both looking straight at me, not good.
Turns out the “new” guy, (let’s call him the dipshot) had passed out between the aisles in the corner store, and when they found him and woke him up, the first words out of his mouth was “George did it”. Little bastard... I didn’t fall in with a bad crowd, I WAS the “bad crowd”.

[olman]

I was at my doctors office the other day and the subject of smartphones came up. Doc told me that he gets a lot of people in for stiff necks and he just tells them that it's caused from bending your damned head at a 90 degree angle for most of the day. Tells them to see a chiropractor and limit your time on your phone.

[chris401]

I was at my doctors office the other day and the subject of smartphones came up. Doc told me that he gets a lot of people in for stiff necks and he just tells them that it's caused from bending your damned head at a 90 degree angle for most of the day. Tells them to see a chiropractor and limit your time on your phone.

I saw a news piece on that. It is a real problem affecting many.

[falcongeorge]

I was at my doctors office the other day and the subject of smartphones came up. Doc told me that he gets a lot of people in for stiff necks and he just tells them that it's caused from bending your damned head at a 90 degree angle for most of the day. Tells them to see a chiropractor and limit your time on your phone.

I saw a news piece on that. It is a real problem affecting many.

So is cancer of the jaw.

[FB]

bring the barista over to my place.....after one cup of my coffee, fresh ground Aribica bean, will have him in the men's room wondering if his entrails will pop out of him.
fancy whipped bullcrap doesn't make a cup of JOE.
i share the pain.....

[falcongeorge]

bring the barista over to my place.....after one cup of my coffee, fresh ground Aribica bean, will have him in the men's room wondering if his entrails will pop out of him.
fancy whipped bullcrap doesn't make a cup of JOE.
i share the pain.....

I buy green beans and roast them. I go to Vietnam every year too, usually buy some beans there, as well as mail ordering Ethiopian and South american beans. Last year I came home with a kilo of a dry processed hybrid robusta bean, I don't usually buy robusta, but this was from a family friends coffee farm, it was a robusta hybrid they have been developing, this was from some beans he aside to submit to overseas buyers, it was surprisingly good. He cupped some for me before I bought, I thought it was dry processed Ethiopian.

[shady]

Dunkin Donuts is good enough for me.

[falcongeorge]

Dunkin Donuts is good enough for me.

My condolencences...